Question meme

[ironicusername]

Question meme since Dirk is almost at 1000 and it has absolutely been a month since the last one you don't need to fact check me on this.

Primarily for Dirk Strider/Ruby Twinkle and Yuri Lowell.

And anyone else I play.

Oh right appearance update and some general info on mannerisms for Dirk.

Comments

[2xcanoodlingkind]

Hrrrm. I'm still kind of feeling my way through Dirk because it's hard playing him as still smart but at a lower emotional intelligence and most importantly, less empathic. Honestly he's not less empathic because he lacks the innate ability to care! But I assume GROWING UP TOTALLY ALONE sort of stunted his ability to actually feel emotions. So he registers 'this is bad' much more clearly than he registers 'this is sad'.

I kind of imagine that at some point as he was growing up, probably not long after he started communicating with the kids, he realized his general lack of affect - not just not expression emotion but rarely really feeling it - was weird. BEING DIRK he just decided that lacking such an obviously important thing was not down and actually set about HOW TO FEEL MORE. And because he isn't a sociopath just a hugely neglected but intelligent kid, he was pretty successful. He's always gonna be a chill mother fucker but he hit a point where he could resonate with other people's emotions and, importantly!!, use that ability to better understand/manipulate them.

So anyway, that's what he is lacking rn with Dave. He cares that Dave's only memory is SHIT and he can tell there is some kind of... wall with Dave that he doesn't understand?? (Because he can't yet empathize with insecurity) but he's still overall lacking that ability to really emotionally connect. He cares a lot! In his own stilted and fucked up way. Just. There is a lack of truly syncing up for him and it's frustrating as fuck. But again frustration in a sort of weak ass like "I guess I need to work harder at this" without anything truly emotional about it.

The problem is he doesn't really know HOW to work harder at it. He probes because he figures he needs info, and that is true! But he still doesn't really get how to use that info. He basically doesn't understand what is wrong. If Dave were himself a more emotive person he would be faster about making the jump of OH THERE ARE A LOT OF FEELINGS HAPPENING HERE >> I don't understand feelings >> I need to understand feelings. But he doesn't really get how emotional Dave truly is. That he cares about a lot of things! Yes! But not the degree to which there is a turbulent sea of feels under that chill as veneer at all times.

So yeah rn he is still trying to figure out what is missing and what he needs to do. Once he figures out THAT he can start on Dave's one million other issues but atm Dirk's own emotionally stunted nature is the primary road block. This means that even though he can objectively read Dave, he doesn't really understanding what he is reading. DAVE'S DEATH WAS HORRIBLE AND THAT IS BAD SO I WILL FIX IT. Ok. Even DAVE'S DEATH WAS HORRIBLE AND HE WANTS TO AVOID TALKING ABOUT IT. Ok. But not like. DAVE'S DEATH WAS HORRIBLE FIRMLY CEMENTED IN HIM A SENSE OF TOTAL FAILURE THAT WILL HAUNT HIM FOREVER.

It's going to be a while before he really gets what is up with Dave.

Ruby on his newest memory...